We never change, do we?

Donno how to say that...it seems to me that words cannot describe the wishes I have. The dreams I dream, even when I am not sleeping. How can you wake up from a daydream? You can't. At least I can't. Cause I want it. I want it so badly that I have this pain in my chest. I can sit at my Laptop for hours and hours and kinda "be" with all those great people I look up to. Videos, Pictures, what they say, and how they say it, how they move and how they smile and laugh. Everything. They inspire me everyday...all those different people, who are kinda...well -the same. They are people who embody people. Characters, they cannot be in real life, characters, they would like to be in real life. And then there is Me. I would like to be one of them. A part of something but also one of a kind. Maybe become exactly that to someone in the world, who I am looking up to. It just makes me dream sometimes. But I like dreams. It keeps me going. It keeps me standing up, when I am on the ground. Just makes feel good.
I tell other people and they laugh. So I am not telling anyone. This is for myself. It just felt like I had to write that down, and I actually do feel better. Didn't know what to do with all those words in my head. Now I know, and you also know. Whoever this might read, or not read.

                                     This is just me and my thoughts. This is just me woolgathering. This is just me.....


Aylin